She hung up on me. In my moment of spiritual crisis, my own mother hung up on me.
And she was right to do so.
Vern and I had been growing quite close. Praying together, serving The Lord together, going to horse shows together, really living LIFE together. And then he went and ruined it by asking me to marry him. I was so mad that I left his house and called my mom.
“MOM! Can you believe it? Vern asked me to marry him and I am SO UPSET. Why did he go and ruin a perfectly good friendship like that? We were doing so GOOD together. I was so COMFORTABLE with how things have been…” and on and on.
“Well, Nancy. Did you ask The Lord what he thought about this?”
“NO, MOM. Why would I do THAT?!! I’m asking YOU what you think.”
And she hung up on me.
She hung up on me because her faith in The Lord told her that He would show me the answer. The perfect answer.
By the time I got home, the Holy Spirit was so heavy on me that I could hardly breathe. I went straight to my prayer closet, mad as a hornet and started to pray. Well, started to talk AT God. Have you ever done that? Talk AT God rather than with Him? I made some pretty good arguments about why marrying Vern was not a good idea. I just couldn’t understand why The Lord would lead me down a road that would surely cause me great pain as my first marriage had. But that heavy feeling of the Holy Spirit’s presence would not go away. I knew I was not in The Lord’s Will arguing against marrying Vern. The Lord wanted me to marry Vern.
And so, I leaned into my faith in The Lord and submitted to His Will. That heaviness of the Holy Spirit lifted and I immediately felt JOY. Like, crazy peaceful JOY. Deep JOY. Can’t-take-it-away-from-me JOY. I had the faith to know that somehow marrying Vern was in God’s plan and had a purpose. I was eager to discover God’s purpose in this new chapter of my life.
And God was faithful to reveal that purpose. Not right away, but over time. I learned that The Lord gave me Vern as my husband to show me what it looks like when another wholeheartedly gives their life to others. That’s my man. He is my gift from God used to deepen my understanding of who Jesus is.
My mother knew that I needed Jesus to speak to me that night she hung up on me. She knew I needed Jesus, not her. She also knew that her advice would be flawed, even though she is a Godly woman. Hanging up on me was the surest way to drive me to the feet of The Cross and have an experience with Jesus that would change my life. I’m so thankful she did because He had the answers for me that night, not her.
In Romans Chapter 1 verse 17, Paul tells us that the righteous (believers in Jesus) will live by faith alone (“first to last”) and through this faith are obedient to Him (Romans 1:5). Are you struggling with an issue that has you running to humans for the answers, or are you running on the fuel of your faith alone to seek Christ and be obedient to His Will for you? He is all you need.
P.S. The people in your life who continually point you to Jesus for the answers are really precious. I am praying that each of you have such people in your life…even if they hang up on you occasionally.
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